Crazy Philadelphia Eddie

You’ve been thinking about it for a while, and you want to get your first tattoo.
Congratulations!
Let’s talk about how to make the experience one to remember for all the right reasons.
Here’s our ten step guide to getting your first tattoo.

1) Pick a Safe Studio

We want your experience to be memorable and pleasant, not a horror story.

Here’s how to choose a safe place to get a tattoo.

First, shop around and see what’s available. Get to know artists by following their Instagram feeds. Talk to friends with tats and see who they recommend.

If a place seems too cheap, it probably is. You’re likely to end up unhappy with the results or at risk of infection.

Then, visit the tattoo studios that appeal to you and ask questions.

Does the place look clean? Do they have an autoclave to sterilize equipment? Will they open a fresh needle right in front of you when it’s time to start working? Are the staff wearing gloves?

If you aren’t happy or comfortable with what you see, try somewhere else.

2) Preparing for Your Tattoo Appointment

What instructions did the tattoo parlor give you?

Depending on where you’ll get inked, you may have to shave. And then, you won’t be able to shave that spot again for a couple weeks.

Did you pick up a numbing cream? (Double-check that the artist doesn’t mind if you use one.)

Remember that some places are more sensitive than others. The backs of your knees, your ribs, and your face might not be best for the first time.

3) Have Your Art Ready

You’ll need an example of the tattoo you want. Be prepared to discuss it with the artist. Bring the design with you to show them.

Consider color, style, and font if you’re going to have something written.

This is your own personal body art. Listen to what other people say, but remember it’s your choice and it’s there because it means something to you.

Think carefully about the art you want. Tattoos are difficult, but not impossible to remove. An easier option is to have the tattoo filled in or altered.

If you’re not certain about the design or its placement, find an artist who does henna tattoos. Those only last for a week or two. Then use that as a demo to see how you feel about tat you’ve chosen.

4) Eat and Relax Beforehand

Have a meal and relax before you show up at the studio. Bring snacks, headphones or something to entertain you.

Apply numbing cream according to the directions before you arrive. Some need an hour or two to reach full potency.

Don’t fret about having to take a break during the appointment. In most cases, it isn’t a problem at all if you need to go to the bathroom. Just check with the artist before you begin.

5) Bring a Friend If You’re Nervous

Depending on the studio, you might be able to bring a friend. It’s extra helpful if your friend already has a tat and had a good experience getting it.

If you can’t see where the artist is working (like on your back), your friend can update you on the progress.

Keep in mind that the skin may look red and irritated, but that will pass.

6) Yes, It’s Going to Sting

You’ll feel more scratching, stinging, and burning if you don’t use a numbing cream. But getting a tattoo isn’t the most painful thing you can do.

Take a deep breath and go to your happy place. Accept that the unpleasant feelings will pass and it’ll be done before you know it.

If you’re especially worried about how you’ll handle the pain, get a small, simple tattoo without a lot of shading.

7) Keep It Clean

Once your tattoo is done, it’s very important to keep it clean.

Before you visit the studio, get one of the best antibacterial soaps for washing tattoos. It’s likely that the tattoo parlor will recommend their favorite brand. Then you’ll be ready to care for your new ink.

Also, think ahead of time about how to shower for the first few days. You might need to wrap your tat in plastic wrap to protect it. That’s because you don’t want to keep the scab wet.

While the tattoo is healing, you’ll need to wash it once or twice a day.

8) Keep It Moisturized

Another item to put on your shopping list is care cream. Ointments like Aquaphor and other moisturizers for new tattoos will speed up healing.

Follow the tattoo artist’s directions and don’t freak if it bleeds a little ink the first day. That’s normal.

During the healing process, your scabs will flake off – but don’t pick them. If your skin is itchy, slap on more moisturizer.

9) Keep It out of the Sun and the Water

Until your tattoo is fully healed, avoid sunbathing and swimming. This may take a couple of weeks or longer, so getting a new tattoo in the summer can cut into your outdoor plans.

Ultraviolet radiation will fade the ink, and soaking in water can damage a new tattoo.

Once your skin has recovered, protect your body art with one of the best tattoo sunscreens.

If you tan indoors, there are also tanning lotions to keep your ink bright.

10) Ask for a Touchup If You Need It

Even if you went to Michelangelo or da Vinci for your tattoo, you might notice a small detail you want to adjust.

Don’t be afraid to ask the artist to do a touchup.

It’s better to take care of it in the first couple of weeks than to wait.

One Last Tip – for the Tattoo Artist

If you appreciate the artist’s work, tell them, and show them by leaving a tip. The usual is fifteen to thirty percent of the cost of the tattoo.

They might have it if you mention their work on social media, too.

We hope you have an outstanding experience when you get your first tattoo.

In Greek mythology, King Midas had the golden touch. Everything he touched turned from muck to gold. In American tattoo history, there has been no person with this type of luck. Some tattooers may have lived enchanted lives, but there is hard work, persistence, and an unrelenting will that seems to be the forgotten part of their stories. After his start in Coney Island, Crazy Philadelphia Eddie tattooed through countless payday weekends yelling “Next! Next! Next!”, fought the New York City ban, starved through the winters, and built many, many, many tattoo shops.

In Volume Five, Crazy Philadelphia Eddie battles the rats in Chinatown, renovates a dilapidated, empty shell of a building filled with dog shit in Kensington, develops liquid tattoo inks, falls in love with his soul mate, manages the tattooers at his shops, travels the world by ship, hosts conventions, and keeps the peace between rival motorcycle clubs. Not an easy task, but with his determination, Eddie seems to be able to cut through any grit.

In this volume, Eddie shows little restraint when dealing with those that disrespect his friends and tattoo family. Being a solid friend, a man of his word, and relentless, Crazy Philadelphia Eddie demonstrates why he is one of America’s tattoo godfathers.

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I suppose a person will always remember their first tattoo, the shop  where they got it, and who gave it to them.   I am sure that Eddie’s son, Joe, will always remember the first tattoo Eddie gave him.

Eddie tells a story about visiting Sailor Jerry’s shop in Hawaii, and about the first time he wore rubber gloves while tattooing.

Eddie fully understood the importance of wearing gloves, sanitation, and sterilization.   However, he was not so sure the Health Department Officials understood the importance of these precautions.   In this clip, Eddie asks some fairly important questions.

Eddie is NOT a man to be trifled with when it comes to his family, friends,  or business.   A handshake seals the deal, and it is a gentleman’s agreement.   There is never a hidden agenda in the fine print with Eddie.   If a person breaks their word, cheats  him, or threatens one of his friends, Eddie will straighten out everything.

In the first half of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie’s books, his life story began with his wild youth, continued into his twenties where he established himself in Chinatown, Philadelphia, and covered the seminal years of the National Tattoo Association during his thirties. Even if Eddie expected his life to become more tranquil as he matured, the insane world around him made that impossible.

Volume Four of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie’s series is a flurry of midlife adventures including the rise of the National Tattoo Association and its conventions, the pitfalls of heavily gambling, the opening and managing of several tattoo shops, the fallout of a wedding engagement and a turbulent romance, the tragic murder of a good friend, and the trials and tribulations of raising and employing his eldest daughter and teenage sons.

Shortly after finishing this volume, Eddie was in a bar drinking screwdrivers with his ghostwriter, Eric Foemmel, who asked Eddie to sum up the fourth volume of Tattooing: The Life and Times of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie, My Vida Loca. Eddie did so with two words: “Holy Shit!”

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I was never a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, but Eddie has convinced me otherwise.  Sometimes, you might not like the outcome, but their is a reason it happened.   In this clip, Eddie tells about the disappearance of another tattooer.

I am pretty sure Eddie has met more than a million people in his life, and he rarely forgets a person.   In Kentucky, there were two tattooers he remembers as stand-up gentlemen: Jay Ray Smith and Charlie Wheeler.

Stoney St. Clair is another Southern gentleman tattooer that Eddie met in his travels, and he always good things to say about this man.  Eddie feels like he knew this man before he met him.

This is another great story about one of Eddie’s card games.   In this clip he tells about the good fortune that follows when he held several wild cards  in his hand.   That night, justice was served!

In Volume One of Tattooing: The Life and Times of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie, My Vida Loca, Mr. Eddie Funk quickly established his place amongst the tattooers at Coney Island, extensively traveled the United States meeting many characters, and tattooed in several cities. Through those adventures, Eddie became a seasoned tattoo man and earned the nickname, Crazy Eddie.

In his second volume, after opening a few tattoo shops in Philadelphia, Eddie developed friendships with several tattooers, and he started personal wars with a few tattooers. Wrapped up in tumultuous love affairs, and tattooing in a neglected part of the city—Chinatown—Eddie claimed this neighborhood as his territory. He quickly became, Crazy Philadelphia Eddie.

As he continues his stories in this third volume, Eddie finds himself traveling between California and Pennsylvania and again visiting foreign shores. Opening more tattoo shops, dealing with turf wars and fierce competitors, and coping with the loss of loved ones, Crazy Philadelphia Eddie finds himself at a pivotal time where he begins to heavily influence, shape and equip the tattoo industry.

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In this clip, Eddie talks about the “body painting” shop he opened in North Carolina.   It was a hit with the Marines, but it was a target for the local law enforcement.

In this second clip from Volume 3, Eddie continues his telling  about his adventures with the neighborhood tough guy, Goergie Cheety.  Trouble and drunken brawls always followed this man.

In this third clip, Eddie explains how you can use bricks to influence people and make friends.   It just takes a little finessing, but it can  be done.

Eddie is a man who loved to play cards, and it is always important to garner the respect of the other players at the table.    Even if you don’t have the winning cards in your hand, you can still the psyche the other players out and  have them in your pocket by the end of the night.

In the 1960s, Mr. Eddie Funk opened several tattoo shops on Race Street in Chinatown, Philadelphia.  Deemed as urban blight by city planners, this cityscape was home to bums sleeping on the streets where prostitutes worked, despondent drunks dwelling in flophouses, and industrious grifters and downtrodden–yet honest–characters hustling and gambling for easy fortunes.  Amongst the handful of tattooers in this neighborhood, Eddie hung his flash on the wall, unpacked his stencils, mixed his inks, started tattooing, and joined the fray.

Bringing his Coney Island charm to Chinatown, Crazy Eddie made interesting friends, enjoyed drinks as several bars, found himself entangled in marital bliss, established himself as a tattooer in a new city, and cemented the permanence of his legendary moniker: Crazy Philadelphia Eddie.

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Please listen to the four excerpts below taken from from Tattooing: The Life and  Times of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie; My Vida Loca, Vol 2.   Each audio disk comes with eight forty-minute tracks of Eddie telling the stories for each book.  These are the raw files ghostwriter, Eric Foemmel used to write Eddie’s books.   The disks have many large files, so it meant to be played on your computer or loaded onto your itunes.

In this first excerpt from Tattooing: The Life and Times of Crazy Philadelphia Eddie; My Vida Loca, Vol 2, Eddie describes what Chinatown looked like in the 1960s.  From this location, he built his tattoo business and legacy.

Eddie describes what would happen when he tattooed minors.   As a tattooer in the 1950s and 1960s, he was prepared to be arrested and jailed at least every two years.

Jack Dracula, who had worked for Eddie in Coney Island and in Chinatown, was beginning to become an aggravation for Eddie.   After Eddie drove his car through Dracula’s shop, he wanted to punctuate the message with a brick.

Eddie traveled to many cities for fun or business.   Regardless of the reason of his excursions, Eddie was always found himself in the center of the action.  Las Vegas was no exception for Eddie.

In the summer of 1952, Mr. Eddie Funk was fifteen-years-old and about to begin his life as a young man. Drawn to the excitement of Coney Island, fascinated with the art of tattooing, and intrigued with the lifestyles of the Coney Island tattooers, he knew his place was among these veteran tattoo artists. With his affable personality, his ability to tattoo, his fists, a hammer, and a gaff hook, he quickly established his place in the tattoo industry and was dubbed Crazy Eddie.

During his travels from New York to Denmark to Chicago to Hawaii, he always demonstrated why he earned this moniker. After reading this first volume of Eddie’s unique, reckless, and good-hearted approach to life and tattooing, you will agree that Crazy Eddie is fucking crazy! It is almost certain that you will also view him as a likable and generous man who inherited a rich, cultural practice from the founding fathers of American tattooing.

The stories in this first volume chronicle the life and times of a young tattoo artist who will eventually become one of the godfathers of American tattooing.

$30/$50 with CD

Please listen to the four audio clips from this volume.   These are the recordings ghostwriter, Eric Foemmel used to write this oral history.   An audio CD is available for each volume.  The disk contains eight MP3 tracks, and each track is approximately forty-five-minutes long.   Due to the large files, the CDs are meant to be loaded onto your Itunes, or other MP3 player on your computer.

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